I feel on track and in tune with my inner momentum. You see, I’ve been stuck on carousels for a while. Up and down. Round and round. Stuck in a feeling.
Stuck has become one of my least favorite words. I never want to feel that way. It’s an absurd way to live life because as a human I have this incredible power of better choices, change and movement. Let’s always be moving forward, upward, sideways, and never backward or nowhere.
The beauty of analyzing the past comes with epiphanies. The “ah-ha!” moments. The “wow, why the heck did i do/say that??” moments. I’m trying more diligently to put lessons I’ve learned to proper use. I’d like to let go of a lot, while still nurturing an open enough heart and mind to let people, feelings and ideas in.
New creative projects are in the works. Confidence in my authentic self is at an all time high. I’ve reached a new comfortable level of ambivert, which has me feeling so lifted I wake up with less anxiety and more excitement. With people or with just me, I am happy.
This is not to say I magically waved away all sinking feelings. But right now I feel balanced. Although often perceived as weakness, I accept my softness, my sensitivity. They can be assets, just as much as my ability to be strong-willed and tough. Resilience is a major key.
Every year there are several moments when I plan to turn right, and then life is like “tut tut, we’re going left instead.” There is no way in telling what my life will be like in 3 months, 3 weeks, or hell, I don’t even know what 3 hours from now could hold for me. All I can do is hope for the best and make moves. I’m a planner so the uncertainty can feel a little uneasy, but I’m learning to take things on as they come.
I purchased my first instant camera yesterday, and I like that it’s an unpredictable tool. What I snap is what I’m going to get. I’m calling her Patsy. She lives in the moment, wears a glitter case and I adore her already.
Here are some photos I took yesterday at the Beating Lights kick off show in East Hollywood. Great jams, good company and the best vibes.
I put together a 2k17 mood board on Pinterest and playlist (below) to set the tone for this year. Maybe if I put a bit of my spirit, hopes and desires out there, some of it will stick.
I love sad songs. I’m a fan of melancholic sounds and lyrics, not because I like to be unhappy, but because it’s necessary to experience sadness. We don’t just feel this emotion. We live through it, we learn from it, and we grow because of it. With themes varying from death, to a broken relationship, to the feeling of being lost, sad songs are there as a shoulder to cry on. They become soundtracks for our disappointments.
For a while, I’ve wanted to buy a print or shirt from Stay Home Club, a brand for the disgruntled, but could never decide on a favorite item. When they added a “Sad Songs” two-tone tee to its online store, I purchased it immediately. It was partially an impulse buy, but I’m happy (hah!) and in love with it.
You can’t have a sad songs blog without a sad songs playlist. Title inspired by Stay Home Club. Listen below or here.
My first major project for a band called The Summer Set was to help launch its new Half Moon Kids website and Fall 2014 clothing line. After endless email threads, long days and last minute changes, we launched. Then the site crashed within a minute. (not so)Minor setback. But! The kids were still thrilled; fueled by their love of the band and the Half Moon Kids community.
And then it suddenly hit me.
I’m here to make dreams come true. That’s what I’ve always wanted to do. My description for what my position as an assistant to artist managers can be quite lengthy. It consists of a variety of important small and big tasks, but generally speaking, I can summarize my position in one sentence: I help handle the nuts and bolts for an artist’s business so they can concentrate on their craft, and I put smiles on kids faces across the globe. Rad learning experience.
I accept the successes. I accept the challenges. I will learn from the mistakes.
Stoked, a surfer slang term that originated in the ’60s, is one of my favorite words to express my enthusiasm for something.
Right now, I’m stoked about: traveling North America with Warped Tour / stepping out of my comfort zone / discovering new bands / meeting new people.
Los Angeles-based apparel brand The Times is embracing a summer of stoke with a new collection and I’m very excited to be sporting a piece of it this summer. I hope to take a variety of photos of myself in it while I’m busy being a tour gypsy. For now, here are a few snaps of me in The Times “Stoked” tee.
When I was a kid, my eye doctor always nodded approvingly at my sharp eye sight. When 5th grade arrived, the world around me started becoming a tad blurry. But as a naive little girl, I looked forward to purchasing my first pair of glasses. I thought they were the coolest thing. Probably because my mom wore them.
So, I got my first pair. They were thin and my favorite color (at the time), blue. Fast forward to the 7th grade and I hated wearing glasses. They were annoying to wear in the rain. I didn’t like how I looked in them. And even when I bought hipper looking frames, the cool effect had worn off. Eventually I got contacts and have worn them ever since, using my glasses as a backup.
But there was always a particular pair of thin frames that I adored. They were the big sunglasses my mom had worn in the ’80s and as a fan of funky accessories, I had my eye on them. Speckled with pink, yellow, purple and blue, they looked like confetti. Last year, I approached my mom about them and she decided to pass them down to me. After having the prescription changed, I’m revisiting my love for glasses by sporting them almost every day.
These frames definitely make a statement. Probably why I love them so much.